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  • Writer's pictureJerry Della Femina


I remember Election Day November 2020 like it was yesterday.

I went into the polling booth.

I have been a lifelong Republican, so this wasn’t easy. I had voted for Hillary in 2016, for all the good that had done.

Now I voted for Joe Biden.

Nowhere in the pristine polling booth did I see the name of that creepy old commie, Bernie Sanders, nor did I see the name of that beautiful but incredibly dopey Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez.

I voted for Joe Biden for the same reason millions of Americans voted for Biden that day.

Because he wasn’t Donald Trump.

I knew Biden wasn’t very smart. But he surely had to be a little smarter than Donald Trump.

I knew Joe Biden was slightly corrupt, but he couldn’t compare with Donald Trump, who was completely corrupt.

I knew Biden was a liar, but not in Trump’s class. Plus, Biden was preaching love and moderation, saying he wanted to bring our fractured country back together. How could he be lying about that?

So what the hell happened?

Nine lousy months later:

Biden is being led around by the nose by Bernie Sanders, Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and a squad of loopy progressives.

A good bipartisan bill of over a trillion dollars to help fix many of our country’s infrastructure problems, which will bring about hundreds of thousands of jobs, is being sacrificed because Sanders and his progressives won’t make it happen unless they can get their way on a maybe $6 trillion or at the very least a $3.5 trillion bill that will hurt this country financially as the progressives wind their way towards turning us into a socialist “paradise.”

To make matters worse, Biden is siding with the progressives on these bills over the moderates in the Senate.

That’s not all. A few months ago, Biden stumbled and fumbled and gave control of Afghanistan back to the Taliban, betraying all our friends. He claimed this was an outstanding success, but even his most loyal and blind media followers don’t believe him.

Biden is pushing us into inflation. Check your grocery bill if you don’t believe me.

How could this be happening?

At first I resorted to my Brooklyn background and became totally paranoid.

I had this thought that Trump had reached Biden’s son, Hunter, and offered him a $50 billion bribe in cash – to be found in a friendly bank in the Ukraine – and all Hunter had to do to get the money was to convince his father to throw the presidency. You know, like the White Sox threw the World Series in 1919.

For a while I honestly believed that was the only thing that could explain Joe Biden’s wacky behavior.

Then I realized how crazy I was thinking.

Nobody would ever trust Donald Trump to really pay any bribe money.

He’d claim he never said it. He’d claim a drunk Rudy Giuliani bribed Hunter Biden without Trump’s knowledge.

So the fact is there was no bribe. Biden is just a weak, befuddled, lousy president.

And every day Biden’s failures are making Donald Trump stronger.

I thought Trump was over as a candidate. Who would believe his lies?

The answer is all of the people who voted for him the first time. Add to that those people who are not ready to allow this country to go the way of Cuba and Venezuela…good Americans who believe if it’s a choice between Biden, whose strings are being pulled by Bernie Sanders, or Trump, they’ll take Trump.

So, God help us, at the rate Biden is going, Trump is going to be elected president in 2024.

This would be a tragedy because I believe our country won’t survive a second Trump presidency. Nor do I think this country would be in very good shape after 8 years of a Biden presidency, for that matter. We’re screwed any way you look at it.

The fact is when I walk into a polling booth in 2024, I know who the Republican candidate for president will be. None other than Donald Trump.

But who will the Democratic candidate be?

Joe Biden? Or, you should pardon the expression, Kamala Harris? Or Bernie Sanders, or, God help us, beautiful Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, who we all know is as ambitious as she is stupid. And is as capable of running for president in 2024 as even dumber Bill de Blasio. Did I hear anyone say Pete Buttigieg?

Think for a second, dear readers. Who would you vote for to stop Donald Trump or, for that matter, to stop Joe Biden?

I won’t vote for either of these two losers, but after that I don’t have a clue.


If I was a plastic surgeon I would put a squeaky toy in every breast implant.

Sunday Morning Sex

Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Sarah went straight to her grandparents’ house to co Sadie, her 95-year-old grandmother, to comfort her. When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, “He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning.” Horrified, Sarah told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble. “Oh no, my dear,” replied Sadie. “Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the ‘ding’ and out on the ‘dong’.” She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, “He’d still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn’t come along.”

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